Mittwoch, 25. Dezember 2013

"And have yourself a merry little christmas.." - Thoughts at the end of the year

Hi there!^^I hope you all can enjoy your christmas in the way you like?:)

Mine was fine so far - We invited a good friend and ate "fondue chinoise" (A typical dish for christmas or silvester in Switzerland - It reminds me of "Nabe" a bit), chattered and laughed a lot!:D:D The dessert was handmade by me, we had "coeur fondant au chocolat"(kind of little chocolate cupcakes with a liquid chocolate heart) and tropic fruits - though I waited a little too long and the heart wasn't really liquid anymore - well, there are still two pieces left in the fridge, so I'll try again tonight!>:D *devil in challenge mode coming!!*

I don't know but as I grew older presents and christmas in general became less and less important to me.. Rather than being together because it's christmas I'd like to spend time with the persons I like just because I want to; rather than being obliged to give someone a present just because it's christmas, I'd like to give a present during the year, simply because I found something just made for this person and because I want to. And usually I like to give handmade stuff rather than bought things (of course that really depends on the person and the present), because I personally put all my love in something I made myself...but maybe that's just me? f(^.^'')

Honestly, I'm really glad that this year finally is going to end in a few days! If I look back...It just seems like a loooooooot of work and kind of a year one had to bite through.. And I honestly ask myself what I was thinking sometimes, because even if I had the choice I usually chose the path with more work!-.-'' I mean -REALLY?!-.-'' sooo typical me (even if I'm normally more the cozy type..-.-'') But even if it's the year of the snake, it luckily is not longer than the others!:P I hope the horse will recognize how much I like horses and be nice to me this year!^v^

I always thought that I would see a clear path appearing before me leading into the future, everything seemed so clear when I was a child..But now.. I'm not saying it's scary, but I'm not used to not knowing exactly what I want to do and what has to be done next..I don't really like that..well, slowly but steadily a hazing trail, more a foreshadowing of a route than a actual path, is appearing before me. I saw a school that really appealed me, but there are still a lot of things I have to settle with myself first. Because usually you can't have your cake and eat it as well..I just have to decide wether I'd rather like to have it or to eat it...:/ Well, In the end I'm still hoping that suddenly a knight in shimmering armor will appear and ram a red flag into the ground, showing me the direction out of the misty valley I'm currently in..If there would be a ship setting sails tomorrow and I had the right feeling, I would ride it without a second thought...well, probably not if it was tomorrow but after my final exams, that is!^^'' But really, I don't care where, but if I could spend another year abroad, doing a stage or working, I'd go immediately! I just want to work and see other cultures, there are so many thing I want to see and do, I think I could get into helping out at a surf school as well as working for an interesting company or cook  in a local restaurant!^v^ so, if you know something, let me know!;P;P

In fact I wanted to write a whole lot more, but I'm actually really tired and think it's better to stop before my typing is gettin facebook g weirder!:P Well, Since it's holidays I think my next post will probably be on soon - I'll inform you guys via and twitter when it's on!^^

Thank you for reading and have yourself all a merry little christmas!^0^/

                                      ^   ^
your cheeky devil!  m(=^w^=)m

(well, that's rather a cat, but that's fine since I looove cats!>v< <3<3)

Donnerstag, 31. Oktober 2013

Heading to the northern lights

Happy Halloween Everyone!^0^/

It's been a while now, but I just got the feeling that I couldn't go on a single more day without writing a new post!xD (In fact, since I'm lying in bed with a really bad cold on halloween's night there is also not much else to do, so I finally got the time..-.-'')

The main reason why there lies so much time between the last and this post is because I was really busy with my graduation project, which is finally finished and I'm very satisfied with (and a bit proud, of course!^w^) I wrote a book about my experiences in Japan, which is partly fiction and partly based on true happenings/my memories!:) I think I'll also upload it here soon (though it is written in my mother tongue, German^^'').

Do you know the story of Jekyll and Hyde? It's like ever since the Kpop group VIXX brought out their song "Hyde", I've been stumbling about allusions ans references to this famous novel and finally got curious enough to read it myself. It's about a Doctor who experiments with his own body and finally discovers himself partet into his good side (Jekyll) and his dark side (Hyde). I liked the book a lot and can only recommend it to you!However, sometimes I also have the feeling of the other me wanting to jump out at any moment, just to say hello and teasing me!-.-'' No seriously, each time I finally think I've come around with a decision of what I want to do, there is suddenly something popping out of the nowhere and sets me back to point zero. Like as if there was a nasty, bored little god sitting on his cloud and grinning full of himself  down to me, thinking:"Hmmm, lets see how I can complicate your life today..Oh, I see, let's start with your newest idea for your future, that will be fun!*mischievous grin* I think it's already much to settled and clear - and simple!That ain't no fun like this, you need to struggle a little more, little human! First, let's show you that your current plan is not what you thought it would be - yeah right, in fact you don't like it at all *hehehehe!*. Then, let's come up with several new ideas popping up in your head, of which each and every one is eighter not really satisfying or really difficult to turn into reality. Then, let's make you think and think over it again, until your head smokes and you don't know what you want yourself anymore. Finally, you maybe have an exact idea of what you DON'T want, but no concrete idea of what you DO want to do. The next step will be that you may find two or three things that you think would be cool, but are really different. You will find yourself disputing the topic with your other side inside of your gead over and over again, without getting to a solution, which nearly drives you mad - Yeah, that sounds like a good plan, let's try it and see, what happens*satisfied with himself*" Well, it's not the first time, my personal "hyde" shows up to complicate my life further - normally the akuma-version of "jekyll" and "hyde" coexist peacefully, one day showing a bit more of jekyll and the other day a bit bot of hyde. Well, it seems to me that my Hyde didn't have quite enough ieeway to enjoy himself, which he apparently seems to compensate..-.-'' I think it's not a coincidence that my zodiac are the twins - one side saying one thing, the other side wanting the exact contrary. Bothersome twins! Well, most of the time I like them, though.^^''

I really want to work in the media branch, and my dream is still to become an actress. But if I want to do that, I probably need to go eighter to London or the USA... If I don't know what to do, I thought abut getting a work and travel visa and just try to make a lifing on my own until I really know what i want - The best way to find oneself is still to travel. Well, of course I want to go back home to Japan, but if my dream takes me to other countries, that's fine too, I can come back anytime later in the future as well ( Well, in fact the most awesome thing would be to work as an actress/in the medias in Japan!I just don't know if I as a foreigner had a chance, since you rarely see foreigners in japanese films...^^''). Well, we'll see what future brings to me - as long as you are willing to work, you'll always find something to survive of, so I don't worry and take my time to discover the one thing cut out for me.

By the way, do you have a bucket list? Personally, I have one!^0^ There are sooooooooo many things I want to do in my life, and because life is so short, one easily looses focus on one's dreams and things one wants to do, so I keep record of the things I want to do the most in my life. My top 3 are:

1.) Learning how to surf (really good!)
2.) See the polar lights (at least once in my life, this has to be so stunning and beautiful!!>_<)
3.) Learning an Instrument perfectly (On my top 3 wanting-to-play list are the guitar, violin and the piano!*v*)

What are thing you guys really want to do? What do you want to experience, what do you want to reach in your life?
I don't know how it is for you, but for me it's essential to have dreams and goas in life, to have something you aim for, something you are really passionate about. If humans stopped dreaming and reaching for something, they probably stopped to move forward and evolve to a higher form of themselves. Dreams will make you to struggle sometimes, but dreams are also the reason you will pull yourself together and get up again, continuing to reach for your goal. A dream has not always to be concrete. Sometimes the only thing of importance is to start moving and opening your eyes, your ears and your heart - your dream may pop out at any point, any moment, without you even realizing it! So if you don't know what you want to do just like me now - don't worry! As long as you move, things will come to you.^^

I just found this beautiful music video and think it fits perfectly  - I ADORE 30 Seconds to Mars and am so exited to go to their concert in Zuerich this Tuesday!!!*__*<3<3<3

I hope I can write again soon,
for now I wish you guys all the best and take care of yourself ne!;P

with a Cheshire Cat - like grin,
your cheeky devil

Sonntag, 18. August 2013

summer tales or: my list of new discoveries

Hey dear libertines, travellers, dreamers, readers, or simplyfied: Hi dear readers!:D

Loooong time no talk! And I meam really: too long!>__< sorry for that!
But now I'm back with tons of things I want to write about, so let's better get started!^^

First of all, mondayschool will start again. But I think this is the first time since I was a kid and school was still fun that I somehow really look forward to it! why? Because it's going to be finally my last year in school!!!:D:D:D And I will have too much things to do, organise and think about in this year! I wanna make my driving licence, I want to reenter the drama group, I'm going to take singing lessons again and I wanna continue with my saturday afternoons in the dancegroup, I'll have to finish my graduation project (the mini book about my experience in Japan, which I should have nearly finished by now if you look at my schedule ...>__< I'll have to make a few writing weekend I think-.-''), I decided that I somehow want to take the Japanese Language Proficieny Test Level N2, and naturally there will be a loooot of stuff to learn in school as well!>_< I honestly have no Idea how I'm going to make it, but somehow I'll have to!x) Well, I'm a genius with handeling stress and chaos, because I'm a master of desaster!:PP Somehow it will turn out fine, I know it!^^

But this summer was awesome, really!^^I met so many awesome and kind people and had a lot of time to think and to just calm down. How did you spent your summer?? I spent mine in France at one of my best friends' house, like that I could improve my French and remeet her after more than one year again!:D:D Two months we where together, day and night. I don't know if you have a friend like that, one you haven't seen for whatever period of time, but when you meet him or her again, it's like you've seen each other yesterday. Understanding without any words. We laughed and experienced a lot in this two months, and thanks to her I could meet a lot of awesome and funny people. We went to a music festival, to the Japan Expo in Paris where we got friends with Shohei, a really nice and easy - going guy who even came to our place for a couple of days, watched films and Asian dramas together and simply enjoyed life. At the end I was even invited to go with the whole family to portugal for three weeks! And she was also the one who helped me to deal with a problem I simply couldn't find an answer to solve it. At this point I just want to say thank you, Cléo, for being such an awesome friend and for this unforgettable summer we spent together!:)バカ者語りはまだまだ続くタゼー!笑 いつでもどこでも歯ブラシのように!ww 

Thanks to France and Portugal I learned to appreciate Switzerland again, which I'm REALLY glad for!! It's just horrible if you don't feel confortable in your own country, probably one of the worst things one can experience I think, because if you're stuck (which is the case with me) you can't leave, even if you hate to be there!-.-'' So I think it's really awesome that I like Switzerland again, this will make things a lot easier!^v^

I first thought that I would just write what I experienced during this summer, but I just realized, that this would take about three or four veeeeeery long posts which would definitely be too much I think!xD So I will make a list with my discoveries of this summer - enjoy!^0^

Music - discoveries of this summer:

Daft punks: A French band that exists since the 80ies (I think) and sings in English. They made the original song of Kanye West's stronger:harder better faster stronger . Another hit which is more up to date and I personally loooooove is get lucky!!!>__< it's just an awesome tune to think, dream, make short for all occasions I think!:))

Blurred Lines - I think there is no need to explain why I like this song:)) Plus, we always listened in Cléo's car while driving to awesome places like the Mt. Saint Michel, while dividing the parts of the background singers between us - mine for example was the high pitched *wheew* all two pulses!:P
Two days before, I discovered a parody version of this song which is simply ADORABLE!!!xD
blurred lines female version - the ladies are talented, and the guys...well, compare the videos, I just love it!:'DD

the banana song omg, Banana was already an insider between Cléo and me, and moi moche et mechant  (despicable me) is just too funny!xD trop géniaaaaal!!:PP

Places to be and what to do there:

St. Malo: Enjoy the beautiful sea and the unique atmosphere with a pic-nic in the sand and long promenades along the beach, find whatever you are looking for at the local bric - a - brac market or enjoy a yummy ice in exotic variations (almond milk, rose petals, lavender, salt buttered caramel etc.).

Mt. Saint Michel: Climb your way up through the stairs and enjoy the view from above about the landscape before entering the old abbey with its beautiful garden inside. Must do: fool around with your friends inside while trying not to be loud which makes it even funnier - the tourists thought we were crazy I think, but we disturbed nobody - I'd never do that in a place like that!!

Paris: Weeeell... Just THE place to be, in my opinion! The city of love is always worth a visit, this time we went to the Japan Expo, where we made a new friend and had a lot of fun, we went on discovery tour of the Japan-/Korea town of Paris (near the old Opéra), where we tried out various things like  French macarons with the taste of sakura, yuzu or matcha and found a lot of things in all the little shops and stores there - absolutely worth a visit!^^ After our little tour we had a little break at the opéra, where a pianist was playing in the middle of the place, openair - What a nice surprise!:))

Les vieilles charrues: A music festival in Brittany, where we went for two days. Upshot: A variety of bruises all over my body, one shoe in the face, my first time I drank a Kir Brittany (based on cider), our first Rammstein concert in the evening (we all were not really fan of Rammstein before, and I don't really like the music now, but the show was just F***ing awesome!!!*__*), a free breakfast in exchange for a toothbrush (a used one, eww!xD), acquaitance with really fun and weird people and a looot of of fun. This year with stars like Asaf Avidan, the Hives etc.

Porto: Hometown of the Portwine in Portugal, this city with Dutch influence has a lot of charisma, a variety of bridges in different architectural styles (one of them was constructed by Eiffel!) and of course: a looot of different god wines.:) You can go shopping in the city, take a look at the mosaic of old houses, visit one of the many churches(and laugh about the state of the Virgin Maria, because the shadow over her lips looks like a moustache and you first thought it was a real one!xD), take a break in the idyllic parc with the glass cupola, take a boat tour or, naturally: Taste and enjoy the delicious wine in one of the various caves. My favorites are white, ruby and tawny - what are yours??:)

discoveries movies and co:

BECK: A movie about rock with one of my favorite actors, Mizushima Hiro
Hanazakari no kimitachi e: Many of my friends recommended me this drama, and this summer we finally watched it together  - funny, cute and absolutely made for evenings with your girls!;P

Discoveries food and co:

Soufflées: just yummy and light, you can make it salty or sweet, with nearly all kinds of flavours!:))
Portwine and cofee: Both things I never liked but suddenly started to like!^^''
Salted caramel: Speciality on Brittany, because they eat just salted butter, which was odd in the beginning but in fact really good. One of the bakeryshops then had the idea to use this butter to make caramel. The outcome is really tasty, try it if you can!!;)
Sangrilla: A punch based on red wine with lemonade, fruits and spices in it, which is often served for the aperitif.

Well, since school starts tomorrow and it's gotten late by now, I think it's better to end this post now!^^''
Every summer has a story, a tale, and one of the things I'm looking most forward to is to listen to all my friends summer tales!:) I'd also like to read yours, if you want to tell me??^w^

I will try to upload more soon, even if I'll be busy!>_< final year, YEEEEAH!!!>w< bb I'll give my best!!!:D:D So see you guys soon I hope, and thank you for continuing with reading my blog! I noticed that I now and then get some new readers, until now I thought that there aren't many people reading my blog besides my friends and family, but if I look at the counties of acces there are also a bunch of readers from countries I don't know, which is awesome!! thank you all for finding your way here and reading my thoughts!:D I hope you will come again and maybe even tell someone that you found that one blog while surfing the web...;P And for all the ones who are not here for the first time: Thank you for dropping by now and then to check wether I wrote something new, even if it takes a long time! you persons are great!! Thank you everybody!:)

Ok, I will stop now!x) have a nice week everyone, stay healthy, cheeky and enjoy your life, because it's the only one we got, so let's make the most possible out of it for that we will not regret by the time we will be old:))

your cheeky devil

Sonntag, 21. April 2013

between dreams and reality: fading worlds,a spectrum of feelings

Hey there, 皆、お久しぶりです〜!(It’s been a long time, everybody)

There are so many thoughts circling in my mind recently. And dreams. And on top of that, many things are going on outside as well. That’s one of the reasons why it seems me to take much longer than usual to post new posts. I just hope that you are still motivated to read my blog, because I really don’t want to get this place abandoned... I know, my blog is just another blog amongst thousands, but for me, it’s something special. It’s my little world where I can settle my thoughts and tell the chapters of the story of my life, and, more important, it’s the proof what I’ve lived through. It’s the proof that I have been there - in the country that has become a main part of myself, the country of gods and the rising sun: Japan. Even if I should forget some things that happened, my writings never will. And having people interested enough to read along with my life even makes it more fun. So thank you, everybody, really!

Recently, I have a strange sense of my surrounding. It feels as if dream and reality coalesce and in the end neither the one nor the other feels like the real thing. I often get the feeling of being in Japan at the very moment, or that Japan is somewhat really close, like I could just get inside a train and go there after school. Or I see myself in Japan, thinking about undertaking something with my friends; then I want to text them something like „hey, let’s go shopping in Namba“ or „Wanna go to Karaoke after school?“ .Suddenly everything fades away, I open my eyes, blink several times, look around me in sleepy confusion, feel the cozy warmth of my bed and finally realize: OH. It was just another dream....

Last year, I felt just like I was about going mad because I felt that homesick for Japan. In the meanwhile, I settled down and got accustomed to Switzerland pretty much again. Now it’s more like a bitter - sweet aspiration what I feel, a dragging nostalgia; or better, an urge longing to be there again. I just miss the people there. The attitudes and the atmosphere they have around them, their humor and their whole appearance. And I miss my friends like hell. And I don’t even know when the next time I’ll go there will be.*sighs*Nevertheless, life goes on, right?;)

From next week on, I’ll work part time at weekends in a big Swiss bakery with café.^v^頑張りまーす!(I’ll give my best!^0^). And a month before, I started dancing in a K - Pop Dancegroup(actually the biggest one in Switzerland, Eterna Gees - They have a youtube channel and stuff, I’ll post the link here when we have filmed our current dance cover!^^<3). I am new there, but I already like them a lot! The girls are all really nice and most of them are just as crazy as I am, so I fit in there pretty well, I guess!x)
 Oh, And I will soon start with my graduation project (卒業作品). I will write a book about my experiences in Japan!^v^ Oh, and I’ll write it in my mother tongue, so it will be German.^v^’’ In a year I’ll finally graduate from high school myself!^v^ I’m sooo looking forward to it! But I have absolutely no plan what I’ll do afterwards!-.-'‘ T__T Well, I guess first things come first, life will show me the way I want to go when the time comes, or so do I believe. I have faith that the wind will blow me just in the right direction, and as long as there is wind, I’m confident that I’ll never regret. Because the only thing regrettable is not to move and to keep on standing still because one is afraid. Courage is not about not to be afraid, it’s about facing your fears. But how can one face one’s fears if you cannot even move I wonder? As long as I am moving, an interesting life full of adventures lies in front of me, that much I know. Nothing is impossible if one tries hard enough. Just have faith in yourself and keep on going!

I’ll write another post this or the next week, I just didn’t want to make this one to long, so please be sure to check this place out now and then!^v^ <3

Well, see you guys soon, stay healthy!;))

your cheeky devil

Dienstag, 12. Februar 2013

Finding oneself again down in the town of cats - a new page

Hello World!!>:D

I’m back!^^ how have you been?:) As always I planned to write earlier, but in the meanwhile you know me better, right?;P

First of all, I have to talk about my whereabouts: I stayed over New Year in Istanbul with my mother. It was sure worth a trip, but I have to say I wouldn’t especially want to go a second time. Well, of course the city is pretty and the mosques really impressive (especially the blue mosque!!*0*), but if you go without male accompaniment most of the turk don’t treat you as an equal -> reason 1: you are a tourist. reason 2(main): You are a woman. I won’t say that all of them are like that. We also met a lot of really nice turkish persons. But there certainly is a difference. And there are sooo many homeless pets like dogs and especially cats(they were soooo cute - and almost all of them looked really healthy and well nourished because the people give something to eat and cuddle with them, so it’s more like they’re everybody’s pet instead of homeless!^^). But I’m so glad I went there - In Istanbul I was finally able to find myself again. I don’t know why, but one night I just told myself: Hey, you have to open up, or nothing will change. And that I did. Not that I haven't realized it before, I just wasn’t able to do it. So I’m really glad I visited the town of cat and came back(I almost felt like the man of Haruki Murakamis story inside the book 1Q84 - If you don’t know it, read it!! It’s really special, and available in various languages).
Even a teacher who knows me really well said when she saw me again after holidays: Now, seems like someone is amongst us again. Really welcome back!:) And I was surprised that she still is able to tell how I am although I don’t have classes with her anymore. Probably because she teaches art - kind of hyper-sensitive or whatever!^^

About school: Well, I’m glad we have holidays now, because I just couldn’t stand it any longer. I didn’t have the slightest sign of motivation, especially since I would have graduation as well as all my friends if I wouldn’t have done this exchange year. On top of that, all my friends in Japan also have graduation this spring, so I’ll be the left-over at school, which kind of sucks. Of course I’m glad I went to Japan and would do it again, but little by little I’m fed up with school..And I still don’t know what to do after school - haaaaaaaaarg, it’s just so difficult. But recently I just pushed myself to hard to decide, and suddenly I realized that I’ve gotten on the wrong track - I just thought about what would be best to have a profitable job, to study something reasonable that I’d always be able to find a safe job. But about all that, I override something really important: What I really, REALLY want to do. What I’d LOVE to do. What my biggest talents and abilities are. What is a life worth if you have a safe job and a lot of money but hate what you are doing the biggest part of your day, even of your life?..
One should listen to one’s heart and go for it, no matter what. If you do what you love, and you really love what you do, then you will, if you really want it and work for it, become a true master at what you do. You have to be passionate about what you’re doing, always and 100%! I struggled and let myself become unsure by what other people said, but in the end it’s my life, and if I have faith in myself, I will achieve whatever I aim for. This is something I learned. So, the only thing left to do is to find out, what I truly and with all my heart want. Then I can start. But I won’t push myself anymore - Nothing good will be the outcome of to much pressure. Best things always cross your road when you expect them least. Just take a minute to think about it!;)..

And last week, I went to Vienna for four days.
I went there by night train, which was a great experience!:D Well, the othere passengers weren’t interesting when I went there, but on the rout back our room ended up talking until 2 o’clock in the morning!^^ the guys I talked with were really funny, and I learned a lot about the lives of each other, which helped me myself for solving my owm problems or gave a new impulse.

I could stay at Raku-chan’s place, which was sooooo great!^^we haven’t seen each other for more than a half year, and since she’s a precious friend to me I was soooo happy to see her again!>v< ^0^ Vienna was great, although we didn’t do the typical stuff!!xD instead of eating Austrian food all the time we cooked, baked and ate looots of Japanese dishes!!x’) For example handmade sushi, self baked melon-pan (メロンパン) and a thing I missed so much since I returned: Maccha ice cream!!!!*Q* In my nearest Asia-shops, they don’t sell it, but hers was a bit bigger, so we got it!!!>v< <3<3<3 It was soooo yummy!! And finally my suffering has come to an end: Starbucks Switzerland finally decided also to sell the incredible delicious Maccha - Latte/frappuccino!!!*heaven*!!^0^bb

We also visited the catacombs, where bones and even whole mummies are buried - it was really cool, but the tour guide was sooo annoying, and the tour itself was really short.Nevertheless we had our fun!x) But just as one could expect from us, we also had few misshappenings: For example did we wanted to see the Hundertwasser house, but the address raku-chan found out was something like the Hundertwasser fabric, so not at all what we wanted to see and at the other end of the city - we didn’t notice it until we asked for the way, and the person looked at us as if we were some imbeciles.xD And the best is, that we wanted to go another day instead after that, but in the end, we totally forgot!x)) Well, it surely wasn’t the last time, and the shopping definitely had a higher priority!!^0^<3 I mean, all my really, REALLY favorite shops we don’t have in Switzerland were there (especially forever 21 and berschka!!!!*0*)!!!waaaw, I bought such a loooooooooot of clothes, haha!!^v^ but I’m really happy about my prey!o^w^o

And tomorrow I’ll go shopping again!!xD Please don’t think I’m a shopaholic (well, actually I might be a little, tiny little bit!^^’’), but I just have to use my free time to the full capacity, if I get some!^0^<3

Well, that was it for the moment, hope to see you again!!;D

xoxo your cheeky devil!;P

Mittwoch, 2. Januar 2013

2012 - music, memories, or: What do I stand for?

YEEEEEY!! finally the holidays have come and brought a little time of relaxation, freedom and peace with them!!!^0^/
Ok, I’m NOT going to write about this year’s christmas  - If you ask why, simply because I was not in christmas mood at all this year...-.-; On top of that, I caught a cold and seriously: I’ve been freezing my buns off since mid-october, always trying to think positive in saying things like: Hey, at least we probably get a white christmas this year - yeeeeaaaaaahhh...-..-... And how did it turn out? 15 degrees and sunshine or rainy weather, giving you the feeling of eighter spring or autumn; probably the most greenish christmas I’ve seen so far - I mean:
WHAT THE FOOOOOOOOOE?! Sometimes I really get this feeling that there is some asshole sitting in the clouds, pointing his finger with a smirk at me and saying:HAHA!

However, this year was just: WOW. And I don’t know how to put this right - I don’t just mean WOW in the positive way, it happend as much of really awesome things as there happened to be awkward moments. It’s just...all this plenty..I can’t find the words if I wan’t to describe this year. And this is the reason why I decided not to make a normal annual review or something.
Instead, I decided to write about this year in songs. I made a list of songs, which I especially liked, which are connected to important memories and persons, or which were/are especially important to me. As most of you know, music is some of the most important part of me and a huge part of my life. Everything I see, smell, hear, experience and feel I connect with music. I need music like air to breath.
Some believe in Love, others believe in god, and I, I believe in music.
And in myself.
Contradictorily enough, I don’t play any far! I wanna learn to play some instruments sooooo bad!!!!!!>.< But as for now, I just don’t have the time!!-.-; But I plan to become a lady as old as the hills, crazy, but full of life and who still got a bright head!^^and therefore, I still have plenty of time, or so I hope!;) One can’t do everything at the same time, right?:)

So, let’s start with the music!;P At first, I just wrote down all the songs, but I’m well aware of the fact that I can’t write them down ALL here - The list would just be too long...^^’’
Therefore I selected the most important ones from there and put them in order of importance (star*=pretty special/important, **=very special/important, ***=life changing/ precious memory)and time. I always wrote down why I like them or what is special about them.If you click on the names, you'll get to the videos!;) Have fun with my own kind of reviewing 2012;))

To start with my list, probably one of my lifetime favorites:

***Chiisana koi no uta - MONGOL 800
I found it about three years or so ago, just around the time my obsession with Japan startet. Back then, I didn’t know a lot of Japanese music, so I just downloaded random albums from the internet (yes, I confess, I AM A PIRAT.)One of them was called Rock is Loft, I think. It contained a lot of different artists and songs, and most of them I didn’t like.x) but one of them was Chiisana koi no Uta (which means little lovesong) and I loved it the first time I heard it, without understanding one word! And since then, it’s one of my all time favorites! It’s so powerful, and it tells me to always keep believing in love, it convinces you that a thing like real love has to exist in this world, even if you try as hard as possible to abandon this thought! And since it’s my all time favorite, I listened throughout the year to it, which is also the reason I started with it^^ It's also the Opening of the drama Proposal Daisakusen, which I really loved to watch!!^v^

Next of my list is **Kaede - Spitz
This was the graduation song of my senpais, and I spent once a lesson with one of my older friends and my Japanese teacher, practicing this song together, because she was going to sing a solo. When I listen to it, I think of their graduation and therefore of change in life and stepping forward. A great match for a graduation song!^^ Another time I went to karaoke with some Japanese friends and sang it....they almost cried because the lyrics are that beautiful!<3

Sakura Kiss - Chieko Kawabe
I know it from the Anime Ouran highschool hostclub, which I also warmly recommend!;) Well, if you ckeck my posts around march, you should be able to tell from the title why I chose it!;PP It all started with a nice pic-nic under the Sakura(cherry blossom) trees, so I always have to think of the happenings around spring when I listen to this song!wwww^^
Also close to this one is Sakuranbo - Otsuka Ai. I think the song is really cute and remembers me as well of the spring 2012 as of my school: Otsuka Ai was a former student at Kohnan Zokei Highschool!!^0^

Ok,*Memeshikute - Golden Bomber is a special one!xD
My exchange student friends listened to it (well, originally it was just Heikki, but he always sang it at karaoke, and so we got to know and love it all with the time). When I first saw it, I was like: OMG, what the...did I just watch?!?!!!xD In the end, they even convinced me to go to a concert of Golden Bomber, and in fact, they aren’t bad at all.^^ “Memeshikute“  means as much as „mollycoddle“, „softie“ or „female-ish“. It remembers me of all the funny days we spent together, also going to karaoke and blaming ourselves with singing it!!x) Always have to smirk when I listen to it!:P

The Ballad Of Mona Lisa - Panic! At The Disco
I struggled about it while surfing the web, and it also reminds me of my change in hairstyle and my fabulous hair dresser in Japan - Guys, if you are in Japan, I URGE you, go to a hairdresser there - it’s just like heaven, much faster and cheaper than here in  Europe, you’ll get some nice special treatment like shoulder massage etc., and you really are treated like a king there!>.< waaaaaah, I wanna go to my hairdresser again!!!T__T It may sound weird, but it’s really one of the things I miss most in Switzerland! Tamura-Kun, why can’t you open a shop in Switzerland???!xDD I’d make sure you’d be the most popular hair-dresser around, no doubt about that!!x))

Again a memory of karaoke sessions:**Hammer Song to Itami No Tou - Bump Of Chicken
has wonderful lyics (typical for Bump of Chicken!^^<3) and reminds me of the time around april/may, when whe undertook a lot of stuff, and our friend Kanon taught us the meaning of the lyrics!^^the title means „Hammer song and the tower of pain“. It’s about a person who gathers all his/her little pains of life and puts them in a box. The person decides to collect one box after another and to accumulate them in order to get a little attention. when he/she has collected 100 boxes, he/she feels like a king, lonely but Something special. With 1000 boxes, the ladder falls down and the person is unable to climb down again. Realizing how lonely and sad he/she is, the person becomes desperate. Just in this moment, one can hear the song/sound of a hammer, smashing away box after box. On the ground, many people have gathered and say:“Hey you, we all want to talk with you, so please come down to the same level as we are!“.

Starships - Nicki Minaj reminds me of all the afternoons I spent shopping in Namba and Amemura with Jessica and Cléo, because in all the shops like „WE GO“ etc., the song was played, and we always complained, how bad we wanted to go party!!^^

The discovery of the year for me is the artist MIYAVI!!!!>v<
He has everything a personification of a music-god qualifies: Fantastic skills in playing the guitar (seriously, level asian is NOTHING against this man!!*0* He’s a guitar-god, no joking!!), a unique voice, a certain aura around his appearance; and he’s SO HOT!!!!!>//<*nosebleed* ^^ xD
Two songs I knew from the start were * STRONG and **DAY1.

L’Arc en ciel is also one of my favorite artists. If I need to think or daydream, if I have a need for a little comfort, i feel like Hyde(vocalist and leader) always has the right song for me!^v^ Fore example **READY STEADY GO,*** Lost Heaven, ***xxxCHASE and ***未来世界 are really great songs.His other band is called Vamps, and a bit more Visual kei/ Rock. One of my favorites from Vamps is the song **REVOLUTION. I listened to it a lot at the beginning of the new school year when I came back, cause no matter how unsure and unconfortable you feel, after hearing this song, you are like:"AH,WATCHA SAID?!I'M SO GONNA KICK YOUR ASS,AHA!!!xD"Once made the mistake to settle it as the alarm - 05:45 a.m., speakers max volume - you'll get the adrenaline - shock of your life!!x'))

ONE OK ROCK is also a band I want really want to recommend you!!!! They're Japanese, but their English is really good( and that means something!;P) and I love the songs and the lyrics as well!! My favorite song is ***完全感覚DREAMER, which means as much as "complete dreamer of feelings", which is exactly what I am...(:

 One More Night of MAROON5 is one of my most heard songs of 2012, I just got addicted to it when I first heard it. But ***SAM TSUI's version I love probably as much if not even better, than the original! I'd rather check it out if I was you...;))

The most emotional song I connect with summer 2012 is*** Glad You Came - The Wanted. Not that Glad You Came would be an especially emotional song, no, contrarily, but I connect pretty important memories to this song, memories of telling good bye, hopes, disappointments and unfulfilled wishes...

Songs I listened to at the end of the year were Everybody Lies - Jason Walker and** Grow - Rae Morris. I think they're just like made for this dull, rather heavy time of the year. Perfect for rainy days and long journeys on the train:))....

But the most, absolutely MOST IMPORTANT song of the last year, my song 2012 I heard shortly after I was in Switzerland again. The ones who read this post attentively and love music may already have guessed it:

***FUN - Some Nights.

It's a song aout the American civil war, but I think it's a song each and everybody can identify with. At least once in a lifetime, there will be a moment where one doesn't know anymore what he or she does stand for. I already had a some of this times, but I never felt as lost as I did when I came back to Switzerland this year. I listened to this song all the time, almost every day, without going rid of it. It always supported me and gave me a backup to go on, even if I can't see a good reason right now. I still don't know what I do stand for, but I know that I want to go on, because there will be one day I will know and can say it with a smile...

The account of my new year in Istanbul will follow soon - I wanted to thank you for reading my posts or even just dropping by here and there - The site reached over 1500 clicks before the end of 2012!!!^0^ Compared to other sites, this may not be soooo special, but for me, it's much and it means a lot to me!>v< you are great! Thank you a lot!! I hope that 2013 will be the most amazing year for you (/us;)) one can imagine!!!;DD A HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE

your cheeky devil